A chemistry teacher puts a $20 bill in a bottle of ethanol


For an experiment, a chemistry teacher takes out a $20 bill and puts it in a bottle of ethanol. He then asks his students if it will dissolve.

A student raises his hand to answer.

Student: No it won’t dissolve sir.

Teacher: Really good! Now can you explain to the rest of the class why?

..

.

Student: You’re so cheap, there’s no way you would’ve sacrificed that $20.

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A bear is chasing a squirrel in the woods.

They cross a river when, all of a sudden, the river genie appears.

Genie: “Well, alright. Two customers. I don’t know who triggered this whole thing, so lemme give you both 3 wishes. Bear, you start, since you’re bigger.”

Bear thinks for a moment. He smiles: “Ok, I want all the other bears in this forest to be females.”

Genie grants the wish, turns to squirrel. Squirrel thinks. He looks up to the genie: “I want a motorcycle.”

Bear shakes his head: “Squirrel, you don’t know how to wish.”

Genie then asked the bear for his second wish.

Bear responds: “All right, I want all the other bears in the COUNTRY to be females.” Genie grants the wish.

Genie turns to squirrel: “How about it?” Squirrel responds: “Gimme a motorcycle helmet.”

Bear shakes his head again. “What’s wrong with you?” Genie then turns once more to bear and asked for final wish. “You know what? I want all the other bears in the WORLD to be female.”

Genie grants the wish, then turns to squirrel.

Squirrel grabs his helmet, puts it on. He then walks to the motorcycle, gets on it. He starts it, runs the engine a little.

As he rides away, not looking back, he yells: “I WANT THE BEAR TO BE GAY!”

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Little Johnny brought home his history test result, it was 90.

His father was so happy about it.

However, his mother Karen just couldn’t believe that her son got 90 in history.

After taking a closer look at the marks, she noticed that the handwriting styles of the 9 and the 0 are different.

“Johnny, you’re so busted. Tell me, did you add the 0 to your marks?”

“No, Mom, I didn’t.”

“I am asking you once more. Did you add that fxxking 0 to your marks?”

“Mom, no, I didn’t add that 0”.

”OK, as you’re not telling the truth, you are grounded for 1 month.”

“Mum, no, please, no, I really didn’t add that 0.”

”This is your last chance kid, tell me the truth.”

“……. I just added the 9 to it.”

LOL!!

Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!