A drunk was sitting in a bar looking at three small brown pellets in his hand.
The bartender asked what they were, and the drunk replied “They are brain pills they make you smart.”
The bartender says excitedly, “Give me one.”
He snatches one from the drunks hand, and gulps it quickly down with water.
In a few minutes he comes back over to the drunk and says he doesn’t feel any smarter.
“You probably didn’t take enough.”
So the bartender quickly gulps down another one.
Half an hour later the bartender asks for a third pill.
This one he looks at with more care.
He sniffs it and tastes it slowly.
“Why, this is nothing but sheep manure!”
…
..
.
“See,” says the drunk, “you’re getting smarter already.”
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Johnny walks into a general store, goes to the owner, and asks for a new job.
The owner says, “Do you think you are a good salesman?”
Johnny says, “I don’t know. I think so.”
The owner says, “I’ll tell you what. The next customer comes in, you watch me. If you think you can do what I’m doing, you’ve got a new job!”
A customer comes in a few minutes later.
The owner says, “Can I help you?”
The customer says, “Yes. I want to buy a bag of grass seed.”
“No problem,” Says the owner looking for a bag of grass seed. “Do you think you might want a lawnmower with that?”
“Lawnmower?” says the customer
“Yes,” Says the owner. “If you plant that grass seed, you’re gonna have a lot of grass to cut. You may also want to buy a lawnmower too.”
The customer thinks it’s a great idea and accepts.
The owner sells him the grass seeds and the lawnmower, and the customer leaves.
The owner turns to Johnny and says, “See that? That’s selling! The guy wanted some grass seeds and I sold him a lawnmower too! Do you think you can do that?”
Johnny says, “Yeah, he can do that.”
So the owner says, “Great. The next customer who comes in is yours. I will just stand here quietly and watch. We will see how you do. ”
A few minutes pass by and another customer enters.
Johnny says, “Can I help you?”
The customer says, “Yes. I want to buy a box of Tampax for my wife.”
“No problem,” says Johnny as he reaches for the box of Tampax.
“Do you think you might want a lawnmower with that?”
“Lawnmower?” says the customer.
“Yeah,” says Johnny.
“You’re not going to be doing anything else for the next 7 days, you might as well cut the grass!”
LOL!!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!
